**I started writing this at the end of January, so I'm going to wrap it up and post the next one I'm working on.**
Life is just moving forward. This flurry of holidays and then a few days ago, it seems, it was January 1st. The whole year lay before me. Then birthdays. Those have come and gone. And now...it's just life. We're nearly at the end of January and it feels as though it has only just begun.
Lots of potential change in life around the corner. And most days, my Cora just sits in my heart. The grief has become less of a burden. Life has moved over and grief is just tucked in along side of it. I don't always cry every day. Yes, some days are far more difficult to handle.
I'm tired. A lot. Life in general, is dragging me down. I am in need of that eagle...for the purpose of his wings. I am weary. Tired of this journey. There is too much. I need a life simplified and yet...it will never be simplified.
So many things have become apparent. Things that I really can't share. Aside from grief, there's a reasoning for my jaw pain. I've learned what I need to do to keep it from flaring. For that...I am grateful.
I do feel out of sorts...like I don't belong anywhere anymore.
I've had several nights where I've gone to sleep before the girls. And when I say that, I literally crash out on the couch and there I stay until Jay wakes me up to let me know it might not be a great place to stay for the night.
And mostly, I'm letting my body tell me what it needs. Mainly...it's rest. So...I go with it.
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