100 Words

I have thought about this post, started this post, and waited to post it.  I have seen something in regards to 50 or 100 words that describe the loss of your mother, but sadly, I wasn't able to find a post that spoke about the loss of a child.  Maybe the 100 words is different for each parent and thus it is difficult to convey.  In any case, I have compiled a list of 100 words that describe the feelings I have felt, the way in which losing Cora has changed my life, my overall demeanor, or the overall feeling of losing my child. 

Here they are:

1. lonely
2. painful
3. unjust
4. depressing
5. hurtful
6. agony
7. gripping
8. tiring
9. stressful
10. unimaginable
11. powerful
12. unthinkable
13. unfathomable
14. gut-wrenching
15. penetrating
16. humbling
17. suffocating
18. heartbreaking
19. anger
20. doubt
21. questioning
22. self-reflection
23. shaken
24. crushed
25. untouchable
26. vulnerable
27. scared
28. bereaved
29. squashed
30. inconsolable
31. bereft
32. deprived
33. lost
34. self-absorbed
35. focused
36. hypersensitive
37. inconceivable
38. angst
39. broken
40. self-deprecating
41. unfortunate
42. unfair
43. devastating
44. life-changing
45. anguish
46. frustration
47. disappointment
48. despair
49. irritable
50. irritated
51. alone
52. outcast
53. self-centered
54. disbelief
55. unsure
56. apprehensive
57. isolated
58. empty
59. forgotten
60. jaded
61. mind-blowing
62. negative
63. piercing
64. quiet
65. rough
66. sick
67. tested
68. victim
69. wronged
70. weary
71. zapped
72. yearning
73. pessimistic
74. exhausted
75. turbulent
76. lackluster
77. incapable
78. incapacitating
79. incomplete
80. blasé
81. riddled
82. sour
83. grumpy
84. spent
85. dead
86. fractured
87. wounded
88. worthless
89. needy
90. restless
91. reserved
92. comatose
93. bleak
94. tender
95. frightened
96. boggled
97. overwhelming
98. vexed
99. edgy
100. doom